1. Just before Christmas, two brothers were spending the night at their Grandmas house. At bed time, they knelt down to say their prayers. As they closed their eyes, one boy said in a loud voice, "Dear Lord, please ask Santa Claus to bring me a Wii, a telescope and a new bike." His older...

By billymayo26, 0  , Views: 46

God made coke, God made pepsi, God made me "oh so sexy", God made rivers, God made lakes, God made you.. Well we all make mistakes.

By AustinSickWear, 1  , Views: 43

A lecturer teaching medicine was giving a classoom observation. He took out a jar of yellow liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observantof color, smell, sight, and taste."After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and...

By Duncan, 8  , Views: 168

A boss said to his secretary Iwant to have SEX wit U I will make it very FAST. I'll throw R1000 on the floor, by the time you bend down to pick it I'll be DONE" She thought for a moment then called her boyfriend andtold him the story.Her boyfriend then said 2 her, do it but "Ask him for R2000,...

By ringane, 1  , Views: 124

There was a boy standing on a corner selling fish.He was saying, "Dam fish for sale, dam fish for sale." Erick dad who is a preacher walked up and asked why he was calling them dam fish.The kid said, "I caught them at the dam, sothey're dam fish."Erick's father bought some, took them...

By ringane, 0  , Views: 108

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father isworking, and asks him,"Daddy,what's Sex?""OK," he thinks, "this day was bound to come, and I'mnot going to let my little princess learn about sex fromthe streets." So, he sits her down, and tells her all aboutthe birds and the bees. He...

By ringane, 0  , Views: 98

I Would Love You I would love you Even if you looked like poo (Though we’d only go out at night). I’d love you forever; Not abandon you like an Old Shoe (As long as you stay out of sight). I would love you faithfully As long as you pay the bills. If...

By Duncan, 0  , Views: 187

*Thou shall not sneak out when thy parents are asleep (Why wait?) *Thou shall not do drugs (Actually, you can break this one) *Thou shall not steal from Shoprite (Woolies has a wider variety) *Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism (Destruction has a much bigger effect) *Thou shall not...

By NundeeNay, 2  , Views: 140

UNIVERSITY OF JOKES A guy asked a girl in a library; “Do you mind if I sit beside you”?The girl answered with a loud voice; "I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHTWITH YOUUU!!!”. All the students in the librarystarted staring at the guy and he was embarrassed. After a couple of minutes,...

By Duncan, 7  , Views: 468

The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners. It’s an armoured booth you step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on your person.   Israel sees...

By Masxii, 0  , Views: 147

You knw its a nigerian movie when 'when they fast forward 30 years later and da family dog is still alive.....

By Chandiz, 5  , Views: 212

I don't know MY SPACE but i know GOOGLE because every time i write my assignments i always turn to GOOGLE for CUT and PASTE - a student said this in the LAN.

By Pinkett, 0  , Views: 149

An old man’s trouse zip was open, a young girl walked by & saw the whole show, politely she went to the old man and said “Sir your garage is open” The old man responded “ooh!my goodness thank you young lady”, she left bt the old man realised what she saw and he called her &...

By ringane, 2  , Views: 330

A man went to ESKOM after experiencing loadsheddings in his small village in Limpopo and he started praying “Our directors who are at ESKOM be thy name, thy kingdom badly run, thy power undone in joburg as it is in the whole of SA, give us this day a chance to see Senzo and Noluntu in...

By ringane, 0  , Views: 256

101 Ways To Annoy People 1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly. 2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." 3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." 4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of...

By Duncan, 0  , Views: 302

I look at my friends and think why do i love to hang with this retards!

By 2cellphones, 5  , Views: 170

A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a while. "I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen.""Nah, he's not so smart," the friend replied. "I've beaten him three games...

By ringane, 0  , Views: 177

A teacher is explaining biology to her 3rd grade students. She says, "Human beings are the only animals that stutter." A little girl raises her hand. saying, "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered." The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to...

By Masxii, 0  , Views: 224

Eskimo Nell  Authorship unknown When a man grows old and his balls grow coldAnd the end of his knob turns blue,When it's bent in the middle like a one-string fiddle,He can tell a tale or two. So find me a seat and stand me a drinkAnd a tale to you I'll tell,Of Dead-Eye Dick and Mexican...

By Duncan, 0  , Views: 132

A proffessor drives into a petrol station in his sleek state of the art Range Rover Sports. Prof: Good morning, ngicela ungifakele I full tank mtakababa. Petrol attendant: I only speak English sir. That is not appropriate. ... Prof: oh! Ok. Good morning. I currently feel a profound...

By fundiswa98, 7  , Views: 301